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Why the Celebrity Actress Got Stage-Fright Before a National Talk Show
“Are you the healer who’s going to be on this show?” She asked.
I turned to face the woman, who was holding on to my arm, as if by a vise-grip. I recognized her immediately. Her image graced the covers of pretty much every fashion and entertainment magazine published a few years before. She was a top model and a star actress.
“I think each of the guests on this show is a healer since this episode is about alternative healing,” I answered.
“I mean, are you the psychic one that’s going to be on this show? The one everyone’s talking about on the set?” She clarified. I told her that was probably me since I heard that the other guests were a naturopath and a celebrity.
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“I’m the celebrity guest on this show today, and I’m terrified,” she blurted out, eyes wide. I laughed and told her she couldn’t be terrified to be on TV. After all, she’s been filmed and photographed and had her image blown up to fill the silver screen and giant billboards countless times for the whole world to see. I told her that, if anything, it should be me who was terrified—I’m the total amateur in front of the camera, and she was the veteran.
“But, you don’t understand!” She pleaded, “I don’t have a problem being a supermodel or the star actress in front of the camera. What’s terrifying me is that I have to go in front of that camera today on a popular nationally syndicated talk show as myself!”
What she said nearly blew me off of my seat. For years, I wondered why national polls consistently listed “public speaking” as people’s number one fear. Over death, divorce, and dentists, even. I didn’t understand it because I enjoyed talking to people in whatever way I could—in private and in public, even in front of a TV camera. It had been an unanswered question of mine for many years. Until this celebrity model and actress told me that she had the worst case of stage fright. Why was she so afraid? For the first time in her successful career, millions of people will see her, not as a fictional character she played as a model or an actress, but as her own self.
I finally understood what made so many people freeze up in fear in front of others. For some, public speaking meant speaking in front of even two strangers in public. Others dreaded speaking in front of larger groups. But, I realized that it wasn’t the speaking part that most people were afraid of. Neither was it usually about speaking to a large group. The fear that struck in their hearts was about being seen and heard as who they are.
You Are Not Who You Think You Are!
Do thoughts ever crop up in your mind like: What if I say something stupid and people saw me as stupid? What if everyone saw me as I really feel inside—and not the happy, cheerful person I try to portray around them? What if people discover that I’m not the nice person they think I am? Many people have fears that if others saw them and knew them, they would not respect, approve, or love them. Their fear isn’t about public speaking. It’s about standing psychically naked as themselves in front of others and risk rejection, embarrassment, humiliation, and all manners of judgment. What’s really at stake for them is the loss of validation and, ultimately, of love. After all, without love or even hope for love in some form, what’s there to live for?
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Facing such an enormous prospect for personal loss and ruin, many of us would get more than just cold feet. This kind of fear grips many people from all walks of life and not just celebrities and public figures. Students, for example, of all ages and educational levels—often the ones at the top of their classes—may live under enormous stress to perform before taking exams. The pressure’s on, and it feels to them like someone has a gun to their heads. You might experience something like that before an all-important job interview or as you prepare to pop the big question to the love of your life.
If you find yourself anxious and afraid as that actress did, what can you do to heal yourself and be able to move forward with what you need to do?
In the few minutes that she and I had before going on national TV that day, I worked with this wonderful woman to be her capable, bright, and beautiful self again. She didn’t have to perform. She didn’t have to be someone “better.” She just had to be OK being herself again. She was experiencing intense fear because she had temporarily lost her certainty in herself. She let the importance of being seen by everyone as the “good” person, the “respected” woman, and the “famous” model/actress eclipse her own relationship with her true self. In her mind, she saw herself as the little girl that still lacked something that would make her lovable to those who mattered most to her.
She believed that what made her respectable and lovable now was that she had become successful and famous. She had been hiding behind the glamor of her public identity. Without it, she feared the world would see a woman who had failed in her marriage and who often felt inadequate. Her famous ex-husband reminded her that’s who she was whenever he had a chance. Would she lose everyone’s respect and love if they saw that she often had trouble standing up for herself or that she worried whether she was a good enough mother to her children?
Of course, none of what she feared about herself was true. Rather than using her inner eye to look at the bright light that she was, she ended up staring at the darker images of what she thought of herself based on her past “failures.” If a celebrity, who appears to the world as “having it all,” can end up believing in such self-invalidation, what are the chances that the so-called “average” person falls into a similar mental trap?
But, fear not! (That’s what an angel would say if one were nearby.) You are never the images that you store in your mind. You are a spiritual being. You are so much more than any mental picture of yourself you can come up with. You are, in truth, the light of the world, regardless of what you think of yourself.
Yes, there may be a vast difference between what you might think of yourself and who you are. You are aware and loving. Yet, all too often, you might become immersed in judgments about yourself and lose sight of who you are. Your light of awareness and your loving spirit become obscured, even in your own mind, in the daily barrage of mental and psychic junk mail. The great news is, however, that you can restore yourself to the real you.
Healing Is Restoring Yourself to the Real You Inside
In the process of restoring a wall in an old house, after scraping off layers of cheap, peeling paint, you discover the most exquisite natural wood. The real you is that beautiful wood, not the layers of old paint. Restoring yourself to the real, aware, and loving you is what self-healing is. There is nothing wrong with the real you. You just need to cleanse your mind of the layers of untrue thoughts and feelings you have held in it to experience the loving awareness and being that you are. Healing isn’t about finding what’s wrong with you and fixing it. It’s about making more psychic space in your mind to shine like the bright light you are in this world.
Making psychic space in your mind just means becoming more aware of your soul-self or who you are as a spiritual being. It’s reminding yourself that you aren’t just a body-based intellectual personality. You are much more than that. You are a limitless creative being.
How can you know that you are a limitless creative being? Simple. You have boundless imagination. It is one thing that is entirely yours, and no one can ever limit it. You have complete freedom to use your imagination and imagine anything you choose to imagine. Your imagination can be limited only if you imagine such a limitation. Of course, usually, most people imagine such a limitation on their ability to imagine and to create. Every time you imagine anything, nonetheless, you are creating.
So, if ever fear strikes in your heart that you aren’t ready or that you are not good enough in some way to be seen or heard by others in the world, first give yourself back your full power of imagination. Give yourself permission to imagine yourself as you truly are inside rather than continuing to imagine all that you lack or all that you are not. Remember, whether you are aware of it or not, you imagine even when you sleep. The choice you have is in what you imagine.
Michael J Tamura’s 5 Step Self Healing Path to Find Yourself
Step 1: Remove the Negative Image You Have of Yourself
Imagining simply means that you are making and seeing an image in your mind. You can also imagine that you’re done with the image you made in your mind and imagine that image exploding in a bright flash of light. In that way, you exercise your ability to create and neutralize what you’ve created should you choose not to bring it into full manifestation in this world.
Step 2: Release All Negativity
Be like a little child who hasn’t learned yet to imagine that he or she can’t imagine something. Imagine sitting on a giant tree trunk connected to your tailbone area and extending all the way down and anchored into the center of the earth. Imagine this is your grounding cord. You are mentally releasing any problem or energy that is not yours down this grounding cord to the center of the earth. Notice what happens.
Step 3: Release Others’ Negativity
Now, imagine an image of a rose in front of you. Imagine that you are letting go from within your mind and energy field any problem you picked up from others. Imagine it as energy flowing out of you and into that image of a rose. Once all that energy is in the rose, imagine that the rose image and everything in it exploding as a bright flash of light.
Step 4: Remove A Specific Person’s Negativity
If you have had difficulties with a particular person, imagine any of that person’s energy you’ve taken into yourself flowing out of you into another rose image. When all that person’s energy you’ve been trying to change or solve leaves you and goes into that rose, imagine the rose image and the energy in it exploding in a brilliant flash. Let go.
Step 5: Final Self-Healing Meditation
Finish up this little self-healing meditation by imagining a beautiful golden sun full of life flowing into you from the top of your head and filling up every cell of your body from head to toe. Imagine your whole body replenished and radiant.
Notice how you feel and even how you look in the mirror. Do you notice a change? This is just the beginning of you learning to give yourself all the psychic space you need to be who you are inside and be on the path to fulfilling the purpose for which you were born.
You can purchase Tamura’s powerful book by clicking on this link – You Are the Answer: Discovering and Fulfilling Your Soul’s Purpose
You can listen to Tamura’s radio show by clicking here – Living The Miracle Living The Miracle – VoiceAmerica
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Michael J Tamura is a master spiritual teacher and contributing writer for Hollywood Insider. He is also the award-winning author of YOU ARE THE ANSWER. Born and raised in Japan, yet educated in American schools, he has spent a lifetime bridging gaps: between East and West, men and women, the young and old, life and the afterlife—and, above all, between humanity and Divinity. He guides thousands to their healing, awakening, and true life purpose as a beloved spiritual teacher, clairvoyant visionary, healing, and psychic development pioneer, and co-host of Living The Miracle Radio Show. For Michael, every experience in life is an opportunity for learning and healing and he shares the wisdom gained from forty-eight years of teaching and counseling, nightly out-of-body sojourns, past-life recall, and a lifetime of extraordinary experiences, including returning from death—five times.